Love & The Country #11 – Trying To Make The World A Better Place

change the worldI believe I am one of the fortunate few who can genuinely say they love their job! My job gets stressful, and there are days especially during tax season and “grant season” when I am up to my ears in paperwork. I put in copious amounts of man hours, I’m paid salary, so I don’t get overtime, and if my colleague tells a client one more time that she needs his “John Henry.” I may scream!

People, John Hancock signed the Declaration of Independence.  John Henry is an African American folk hero. He is known for hammering a steel drill into rock to make holes for explosives to blast the rock in constructing a railroad tunnel. Great Odin’s Raven! Please get your facts straight!!

learn a book

I digress, I really do enjoy my work family. I can give them a hard time, but no one else better try it!! They know it’s all in good fun with me, (except for the whole John Henry thing. That really does grind my gears!) I have been known to put people in their place for upsetting my staff!  I love data research and making pie charts, and bar graphs, and standing in front of our grant funders and showing them the progress we’ve been doing with their dollars! I work in a department that helps people gain self-sufficiency by offering down payment assistance in purchasing their first home, having their homes weatherized, which conserves energy, and saves them money! Win, win!! I also co-run a free tax preparation site, which can eat up a lot of my time, and sometimes make me feel like I’m trying to organize a zoo (Newsflash, Kristian: This is your circus and these are your monkeys!!) We offer a wide number of services, which is pretty incredible, considering the majority of the 39,000 people that live in this rural county are in poverty.  If you would like to learn any more information about what it is that we do, you can visit our website: – FYI, I have gone to our PR personnel and let them know that the 80’s called and they want their website back!! Ha ha! It’s a little embarrassing, actually, but oh well, it is what it is. Sometimes we just have to pick and choose our battles.

With all of that being said, my career is very rewarding and fulfilling, and I’ve learned so much about non-profits that I eventually would like to open one of my own one day! I started a charity a few years back called “Santa’s for Soldiers,” where I collected donations and not only sent packages oversees, I learned who the local veterans are, which ones are really struggling, which ones are alone during the holidays, those are the ones I want to visit, to hand deliver packages to, and just spend time with. They fought for our county, they need to know someone out there cares for them!! I would like to do more with this. I also would like to develop a program that offers free baby bottles, diapers, blankets, etc.. to those who are willing to foster babies who are born with drug addictions, sadly, this is a very serious issue in the county I live in. Numerous babies are born addicted every week! It just breaks my heart!

I find myself having to pull back sometimes from this job though, if I’m not careful it can get the best of me, because my heart is so soft and my desire to help others greatly outweighs my desire to help myself. I find myself wanting to take money out of my own pocket to help those who are really down and out. Especially these elderly widows and widowers that come in and explain their sob story of how they recently lost their spouse, and with them, that extra income they depended on, and now they can’t  afford to pay their bills and are in jeopardy of losing their homes! Oh, how I wish I had millions of dollars so I could just pay off their mortgages and fill their pantries.

I guess I’ll just continue doing what I’m doing, rejoicing for those people who want to help themselves and make it happen! Knowing that I can be a source of comfort, someone they can vent to, someone who will stop at nothing to get them the help they so desperately need, and for those who are not so fortunate, I will sit and cry right along with them. I suppose they can take solace in that too? Knowing that someone out there tried and genuinely cares?

*Sigh,* it just doesn’t feel like enough. My heart is so heavy!

Love & life lessons,


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