Love and the Country #3 – Let’s Get Deep and Philosophical

Sometimes it’s funny how life works, there are moments where we flip out and someone else brings us back to earth and shows us how ridiculous we have acted. I am an Empath, so I feel things very deeply, but the bad thing about that is that sometimes we can burden ourselves with the pain of others, and that will eventually come out, and leave you feeling embarrassed. This recently happened to me with a fellow blogger, and I want to thank you for understanding, or at the very least making an effort to, there’s not too many people on this planet who get me, I just want to say I’m sorry, and I’ll try very hard not to let it happen again.

apology

Time:

I was going to use a lyric from Pink Floyd’s “Time” for this, but I realized when I was reading through the lyrics that I had pretty much highlighted the entire song! Ha ha, well, it is one of my favorites! Anyway, I decided just to share the song with you, so here ya go:

Listen while you read! Yesterday, I wrote another piece of fiction that I had wanted to write for years, but had been too afraid to write, because I wasn’t sure if I could describe a forbidden love quite the way I wanted to. After posting it a friend messaged me and asked me if I believed that our souls could yearn so badly for another, that we carry them with us forever? I told her that I absolutely believed that, and we continued to talk about soulmates, and different types of love, and celebrity crushes, because we’re dorks, lol, Well, I am anyway, I’m the one who brought that up! Anyway, I explained a little bit about how my post was written for a past love, and while I don’t love him anymore, I do still think about him from time to time, it’s not romantic or anything like that, more of a “Oh yeah, that guy, I wonder how he’s doin’?” I did add some elements of fiction, for instance this particular man is not British, but most of you know I have a thing for British accents! I changed some things around, so it is technically fiction, it’s just very highly inspired by a past love, some recent conversations, and Christopher Poindexter poems. After bidding her goodnight I started thinking about the things my heart yearns for most, and I realized, I just long for the little things in life,  I have so much to be thankful for!

Personality Traits:

Yesterday, Amanda sent me a quiz to find my personality trait, and I took it. According to The 16 Personalities Test I am an EFNJ, Protagonist, and I only make up  2% of the population. It’s very accurate for me, actually, almost uncanny, there was only one item I didn’t really agree with, and that was my view on sex, but it barely scratched the surface in that area. Amanda messaged me today through the Marco Polo app, which I love because I can watch her eyes light up as she shares her passion, and I can see her body language, and pick up on her vibes, it’s a nice substitute when we can’t be together in person. She asked me if I believed that we can discover our personalities outside of our experiences? Are you starting to understand why I love this woman so much? I love people who make me think! Before I delve too deep in this, I am going to share three quotes about personalities with you, and then we’ll get into it. I know this is going to be a long post, but I promise it’s worth it.

Are our personalities something that we are born with, or are they made up of everything we’ve experienced and observed? Personally, I think it’s a combination of both. I believe there are certain traits I was born with that no matter how hard I try, I cannot change. Take my ability to empathize, for instance. Don’t get me wrong, I love that I have this ability, that I am able to truly put myself into another’s shoes and feel what they are feeling, but sometimes, I wish it had an off switch, but, it doesn’t, so you can find me curled up under a blanket, crying for the grieving widow on my TV who doesn’t actually exist. This was definitely something I was born with, and I believe that because the older I get the more I realize how rare of a trait this really is. Also, the last quote talks about a mother watching her child’s personality form, how can a toddler, who hasn’t even experienced the world yet, have a personality if it’s based solely on experiences?

I have, however; seen my self change as the years pass by, as I continue to grow and learn, I realize that I don’t always agree with the things that were instilled in me as a child, and this is a good thing, this is me, really listening to the thoughts and ideas of others and being able to to see things from someone else’s perspective. I am much more open minded than I used to be, and I’ve changed so much in the past 3 years, grief has changed me, and as I told Amanda it’s not for the better or the worse, it’s just something I’ve noticed, even some of my tastes have changed.

What do you think? I would love to hear your thoughts!

Love and life lessons,

Kristian

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5 Responses to Love and the Country #3 – Let’s Get Deep and Philosophical

  1. I absolutely agreed with everything that you’ve written. I too do believe that it’s a combination of things we just have innately in us and our experiences in life. There are just some things…Habits…That I’ve had ever since I was little and before I could remember. When I was little I used to think everyone loved me, because what was there not too love?lol…Then when I got bullied for the first time, it was such an eye opener and I was devastated, I couldn’t figure out what I had done wrong! Although I think there’s no reason to hate me and people still shock me when they do. I’ve learnt that it’s probably them, not me, and I handle my reaction a lot better. That probably sounds so self conceited, but I know, in myself though, that I’m not a bad person. I never go out of my way to hurt people. I’m not perfect, but I’m not horrible either.
    I did that test, I got INFJ…I always get INFJ,lol…No matter how much I think I must have changed I always get INFJ,lol … https://www.16personalities.com/infj-strengths-and-weaknesses … I still absolutely agree with it though,lol

    Liked by 1 person

    • kristianw84 says:

      I don’t think you sound conceited at all! I used to be the same way, & I really didn’t like it when people didn’t like me, but now I can honestly say I don’t care. Like you, I’m a good person, I go out of my way to help people, but I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, & that’s okay! There are those that do drink me whole & refill my cup & that is what’s important. You’re right, it’s them, not us! I think you’re rather awesome, myself! It’s funny, I never thought of myself as an extrovert, but I guess I am. I’m not always great at social gatherings, especially large ones, but as I continue to grow & mature I’m finding it easier to let go & allow myself to be the real, weird, quirky gal that I am, & the more I do it, the more freeing it becomes, & I’m finding that I am branching out more and more.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Laura Beth says:

    I love these posts so much!!

    Liked by 1 person

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