Hello dear readers,
Some of you may or may not have known that yesterday was Grandparents Day. I would like to take this opportunity to honor my grandparents & the grandparent figures in my life!
First of all, I feel that I should mention that I never met either of my grandfathers. My dad’s dad ran out on my grandmother, leaving her to raise 9 remaining children (4 of them were already grown and had moved out) on her own. A few of my aunt’s reached out to him later in life, but my dad did not. I am glad, because I honestly don’t think I would have wanted anything to do with a man who ran out on his family. My maternal grandfather died at the young age of 52. He had a massive heart attack. He was a very hard working man, and the doctor said he had the heart of a 90 year old, it just gave out on him. My mother told me that he would have adored me though, and that he would have enjoyed giving me a hard time because I like “those long haired hippies.” AKA: The Beatles! My grandfather liked Glen Miller & the big band type of music, which I too enjoy! It makes me a little sad when I think back to my childhood, and not knowing the joys of having a grandfather. I didn’t get to go on rides in his classic truck, go fishing, or get into mischief. I never got to experience his cooking, his sense of humor, or sit on his lap while he read me stories, but I did have an amazing grandmother, and had she been well, I know she would have gladly done all of those things with me. She did what she could, and I’m forever grateful for that!
My paternal grandmother and I were not very close, but it was hard for me to get close to her knowing how badly she treated my dad. She was both physically and verbally abuse to him, and as wonderful of a man as he is now, I can only imagine the sweet little boy that he must have been back then. How could she do that to him? I digress, she was very old fashioned, she got after me numerous times for cutting my hair and piercing my ears. She told me that if God wanted holes in my ears he would have put them there. She also didn’t like my name, she thought it was too abnormal, this coming from the lady who named one of her daughters Zetty! I don’t mean to talk ill of my Grandma Cosner, I did love her because she was my dad’s mom, but she wasn’t the type of grandma who I could run to, or help myself to food or a drink, and I was always too scared to ask her for anything. She died when I was 17, and she apologized to her children, and she told me that she loved me, and I’m glad she and I were able to share “I love you’s” before she passed. My maternal grandmother on the other hand, was the total opposite. I could walk in her house and help myself to whatever I wanted. Usually a banana or a Kit Kat. She always made me feel loved and wanted. Her home was my second home, she was an amazing woman and she did a lot of things with my brother and I until she became too ill. I often wonder if she had remained healthy, and if she had lived longer what kinds of things she and I would get into. She was a character to say the least, even when she was ill she was always cracking jokes and laughing! I lost her when I was only 8 years old, and 23 years later I still feel like I lost my best friend.
Later in life I got close to an ex boyfriends grandma. We called her Nan, and she very quickly took on the grandmother role for me. I’ve told you about my friend Ashley, well it’s no surprise that her Grandma Shaffer took me in as well. She has numerous grandchildren, why not adopt another one?! She is so fun, and she always has a smile on her face every time I see her, and she always asks me “How’s my girl doing?” It just warms my heart that I have the Shaffer’s love & support too!
After I met Neil it did not take long for me to get attached to his maternal grandparents, and vise versa. His grandfather was like the grandfather I never had. He called me “little lady” and gave me his famous “Are you stupid?” expression when I would say or do something goofy, but it was all in good fun, he would always just smile and shake his head. It happened a lot when Caitlyn & I got together, and I know he was just thinking “Those silly girls.” I distinctly remember one day Neil and I were still just dating and we went over to visit his grandparents for the day. His grandfather was out at the store, and who knows, he probably went fishing that day too. He called Neil’s grandma & told her to make sure the Steelers game was on for me to watch. After hanging up the phone his grandma looked at me and said “Ray must really like you.” After that Grandpa Grab starting watching the Steelers and cheering for them right along with me! I know it’s such a simple gesture, but marrying into a family full of Ravens fans, I can’t tell you how much that meant to me. Grandpa Grab passed away in 2013, but I am fortunate to have spent 5 years getting to know him, and sharing my love of Christmas with him. Neil and I are both very fortunate that he was able to attend our wedding. He told me what a beautiful bride I made, and that he loved me!
Grandma Grab and I have very in depth conversations over cups of coffee or glasses of wine, and I dearly love her. She doesn’t share my love of baking, but she does enjoy eating what I bake! She also is a big supporter of mine, and I enjoy watching classic movies and talking about books with her! She can be a lot of fun, and more importantly, she’s a very lovely woman, without her, I might not have my Neil! She is the glue the magnet that brings all of us together! The first birthday I had after marrying Neil, Grandma got me a card & it said “Happy birthday, Granddaughter.” Tears poured from my eyes because it had been years since I had received a card with the word “granddaughter” on it. She has made it very clear that I am her granddaughter, she does not refer to me as her in-law nor I her, and I can’t tell you how much that and the bond I share with her means to me! I’m very grateful to both of Neil’s grandparents for becoming my grandparents too! Grandma, I love you dearly!!
Happy Grandparents Day to all of the Grandparent’s and Grandparent figures out there!
Love & life lessons,